The Real Cost of “Casual” Feedback: A Product Leader’s Wake-Up Call

In this article, I show you how to structure your performance review sessions to achieve better outcomes for both you and your team

It is performance review season at most startups, and I can already feel the collective groan from startup leaders everywhere. Six years ago while working as a product executive at a 350-person mid-stage company, I was in your shoes — convinced that structured performance reviews were corporate theater that had no place in our fast-moving, lean machine. Weekly 1:1s with direct reports and casual feedback seemed like a lot to deal with. Until it didn’t.

It took hearing this direct feedback — ‘‘I have no idea how I’m doing here’’ — from two of my best product managers, whom I spoke with almost daily, to change my perspective. Then the real wake-up call eventually came when we lost an amazing team member who was completely blindsided that we weren’t happy with their work. I thought I had been clear in our conversations but I was wrong. That was when it hit me: in our rush to move fast and stay lean, we had racked up management debt, one unclear conversation at a time.

So, we built something different. Rather than the heavy corporate process which I dreaded, we implemented a lightweight framework that worked for our size, company stage and culture. We focused on what made people’s “amazing days” truly great, turned feedback into a two-way street (yes, they got to critique me too), and kept documentation light yet meaningful.

The results? Issues we hadn’t even realized existed began to surface and were solved. Team relationships transformed. People started speaking up more. I even received better feedback on my leadership (some of it, delightfully uncomfortable). What started as a reluctant experiment became our secret weapon for building a stronger, more aligned team.

For startup/product leaders reading this, here’s my advice: Being “lean” shouldn’t mean flying blind. Start simple. Ask people about their best days. Document the wins. Make feedback flow both ways.

You don’t need a corporate process — you need conversations that matter.

Because in the end, performance reviews aren’t about checking boxes. They are about making sure more people go home feeling like they had an amazing day at work. And isn’t that why we started our companies in the first place?

Curious about how we turned things around? Here’s a break down of exactly what worked for us:

1. The Approach That Changed Everything

The magic happened in how we structured these conversations. We started with self-evaluation — you would be amazed at how self-aware people become when given the chance. Then we’d dig into what a truly ‘amazing day’ looked like for everyone on the team. This isn’t just feel-good fluff; it’s about understanding what makes people thrive and how to create more of those peak moments.

But here is where it gets interesting: the feedback goes both ways. Yes, it is uncomfortable, but this is how you know it is working. We documented everything in a shared doc and set clear joint goals. Not corporate-speak goals, but real, meaningful targets that excite people.

The impact went way beyond what we expected. Sure, we solved several brewing issues, but more importantly, team relationships transformed. People started speaking up more. Expectations became clearer and even I got better feedback about my leadership.

2. Where rubber meets the road

Think of the entire performance review process like a product you are building. We kept iterating on it, testing what works, and scrapping what did not work. When our team grew or needed change, the process evolved with us. There were no rigid rulebooks.

What started as just reviews turned into something bigger — a culture where feedback flows naturally. People started owning their growth, celebrating wins openly, and tackling challenges head-on instead of letting them simmer.

What started as a reluctant experiment became one of our most valuable tools for building a stronger, more aligned team. Make no mistake — painstakingly taking the time to do this right paid dividends far beyond what we initially imagined.

Remember, the goal isn’t to build a corporate machine; rather, it’s to ensure that more people go home feeling like they had an amazing day at work. Because in the end, that’s what builds great companies.

If you are looking to try this at your startup, start with one simple question: “What made your best day here so amazing?” Then build from there. Trust me, the rest will follow.